(or rather, what they learn from reading books, we discuss and then I learn about myself)
-Don't expect perfection. Give yourself some breathing room. Nobody is perfect and by expecting yourself to be, you are setting yourself up for disappointment which will do nothing but bring you down.
-Keep the promises you make to yourself. Once you start breaking self-made promises, you begin to lose all faith and trust in yourself. Being able to trust yourself is crucial.
-Forgive yourself for your mistakes. This goes along with don't expect perfection. Look, everyone makes mistakes, everyone has a past. It's up to you to forgive yourself for it, to not be ashamed, to embrace all the pieces of you that make you less-than-perfect and say "hey, those pieces made me who I am." I guarantee you are going to find someone else with a mistake in their past, and you will find it so much easier to forgive theirs than your own. Don't punish yourself. Forgive.
I tend to be much more harsh with myself than I am with others. I've never thought of "being gentle" with myself until yesterday, and it was only when I was trying to apply it to someone else that I realized what a beneficial concept it was. I guess that's another not looking out for myself thing. I'll have to work on that.
Be gentle with yourselves!